Joy comes in the morning (Part 2)

I don't know why it has taken me so long to write this - it is the happy part of the story, the joy part.  The "issues" had been taken care of and if we said "yes" there was a little baby boy waiting in the parking lot, waiting to come home.  And a woman walked in with this beautiful baby boy, and she stroked his hair into a little mohawk and cried tears over him as she told us that they have been loving on him and praying over him.  With tears she handed him over to us.  There are no words for the gift he is to us - his name means Jehovah is God, He is our salvation.  He doesn't walk, he jumps like Tigger.  He loves music and climbing.  His voice is the sweetest I have ever heard.  He has a temper and is stronger than he looks.  People stop us to talk about how beautiful he is.  When I walk in to get him in the morning he smiles and greets us with joy.  The road may be long and hard and full of pain but joy comes in the morning.

You make beautiful things out of the dust.

What do I know?

A song came up on my playlist this morning that I haven't listened to in a long time.  The chorus instantly had me thinking, humbled me and brought me to a place of awe and wonder and curiosity and breathlessness.  The words rang out over and over "What do I know of holy, what do I know of wounds that will heal my shame and a God who gave life its name? what do I know of holy, of the one who the angels praise, all creation knows your name.  On earth and heaven above what do I know of this love?" The song What Do I Know of Holy sung by Addison Road questions if we have made Him too small in our eyes - the one who puts the waves in motion, the one who choose me to parent the four kiddos who challenge me, wear me out, make me laugh, give me wrinkles and have increased my love (no, need) for coffee.  THe one who has walked with us as we waited to hear if cancer was the reason for my pain and then held me as I fell to my knees in thankfulness when they said no.  That held us as we moments later found that the cancer was all over a dear friend and stands by her side as she fights.  Does He allow pain and suffering?  Why not me and why her?  I don't know - I guess I don't know that much about holy but I do know as another song states I am most found when I am lost in Him.  I do know that this life is hard whether you are walking with Him or not yet what a friend we have in Jesus.  When words of comfort are lost  He is comfort.  When there is no reason for peace He is a beautiful sunset.  When I cannot move forward He calls me to look beyond the waves and come to Him to be loved, and held and blessed.  When the lies start telling me I am not enough He shouts BUT I AM.  I AM! HOLD ON BECAUSE I AM ENOUGH.  And so we walk on, we shake the dust off our inadequate feet and follow Him - we love because He first loved us and my friends that is what I know of holy. And until I meet Him face to face in all His glory and splendor that is enough.